Ali asked me to be her maid of honor a year or two ago (shout out to her sisters for transitioning to the matron roles and leaving a spot open for me). Since then, she has made periodic requests (future Bridezilla, anyone?)

Today’s request was to end my speech with a mic drop (you can’t make this shit up). My first thought was, “What the f am I going to say that could possibly be more ridiculous than something that would come out of her mouth?” Guys, the tornado of hilarity that is Ali the Blogger does not even begin to stack up to Ali IRL.

She thinks I’m working on a mic drop-worthy ending right now, but it’s widely known that the best MOH speeches come from crowd sourcing strangers on the internet. So for those of you that know (of) her, help me out:

What should be my closing sentence for Ali’s wedding toast?

[Ali is currently single and ready to mingle. Who wants in?]